Birthday Presents

People have been asking me what I want for my birthday. I've told them I'll think it over and let them know. (Escaped for the time being, whew!) Here's what I really want, which no one would be able to afford (and  no, Facebook, I do not want to make a wish):

• A classy spaceship I can actually use all by myself. One that does not have buttons like 'Salvage Extermination by Exemplifying Rodents and sub-Primal Species', and instead replaces them with smarter and friendlier words like 'Get Back Thrown Stuff'.

• A device that notes down my thoughts as I am dictating to my mind an entire prose crafted by my imagination. (Well, yes.) Seriously, it's high time one of these got made.

• A Liverpool FC Season Ticket with free pre-booked flights to England.

• A ticket to the Formula One race to be held in India soon. (Actually, scratch that. it's much better to watch it on the telly, where you get to see everything, rather than being the live audience that gets to watch only one slice. And who knows, my ticket may be on the uneventful stand where there are no cameras to show me the progress of the race. And that is probably very likely.)

Here are my other wants -- subject to change depending on the need of the hour -- which are more priceless:

• Mubarak commits suicide.
• All other dictators do so too, because of which
• World peace (almost) is attained.

Lastly, I want a Wish Granter, that will help me achieve all this. If only.